GRR

So, my son has decided that he needs to throw a HUGE fit everyday when we are getting out of the car in the parking lot of my apartment building all the way until I manage to drag him across the lot and up 2 flights of stairs to our humble abode. Seriously, what is he doing? He will be fine and happy and then all hell breaks loose when I shut the car door and try to go inside. He screams, throws himself to the ground, noodles (limp and difficult to manuever), tries to run and even twists in fierce circles like an alligator. Why? Yesterday, my stepsister was with me and my hands were full so she walked him into the apartment from the car. He was an angel. Walked quietly across the lot, up both flights of stairs and into the apartment. But today, it was just me and him. And he threw a big one this time. I loaded one arm down with groceries and prepared myself physically and mentally for his attack. (lol) He cheerfully exited the vehicle and then I closed the car door and WHAMMO he screamed and noodles then hit the ground wailing incomprehensively. When I used my 'MOM voice' he responded by standing up and pretending that he was going to go inside. Then off he went. Running as fast as only toddlers can. And my fat but with my 20 pounds of groceries yelling 'STOP!!!!' 'BENJAMIN PATRICK DONT YOU RUN FROM ME!!!' ran to catch him. Thank God he tripped in the grass median of the parking lot. It was just enough for me to be able to grab his waistband. I spanked his butt right there in front of God and everybody. (I am nervously awaiting child services... ) On the way back towards the apartment, he is still noodling and twisting and screaming. A grocery bag breaks. Sugar free grape jam rolls and milk thuds. I am furious by this point. I think I may have used innappropriate language at this point or something because he listened when I told him to 'pick up the jam. give it to mommy. pick up cookie monster. put him in the bag. you will walk nicely into the house or i'm gonna bust your butt again young man.' he whined and dragged all the way upstairs and when I was unlocking the door he laid down on the doormat and kicked his arms and legs. (yes, like on tv. i was unaware that this ever really happened!) When I got the door opened, he stood up and walked inside, yelled 'Arney, Arney!!!! and demanded a drink. OH HELL NO!!! who is this and where is my BABY!??? So, afraid that I was going to lose it, i put him in his room (fun, childproofed room) and put up his gate. Then I called my stepsister and vented and ranted while I put away groceries and started supper. I felt better. But Ben was still having his meltdown and I dont know if this is wrong or right, but I left him in there until he stopped crying. I dont want him to think if he throws a big enough fit, he will get out of punishment. I mean, he could have been hit by a car! I was scared to death when he ran from me. Surely he knows what he was being punished for. Or does he? I dont know what I am doing trying to be a mother. Its really confusing and I always feel like I am doing it wrong. WHO KNOWS. I guess its normal, but its HARD. Thank God I love him so much. Its still worth it. GRRRR.....